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318. Joshua F. Speed to William H. Herndon.
Louisville 30 Nov 1866.
Dear Sir
I enclose you copies of all the letters of any interest from Mr Lincoln to me
Some explanation may be needed — that you may rightly understand their import —
In the winter of 40 & 41 — he was very unhappy about his engagement to his wife — Not being entirely satisfied that his heart was going with his hand — How much he suffered then on that account none Know so well as myself — He disclosed his whole heart to me —
In the summer of 1841. I became engaged to my wife — He was here on a visit when I courted her — and strange to say something of the same feeling which I regarded as so foolish in him — took possession of me — and kept me very unhappy from the time of my ingagement until I was married —
This will explain the deep interest he manifested in his letters, on my account —
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If you use the letters (and some of them are perfect jems) & do it carefully, so as not to wound the feelings of Mrs Lincoln —
One thing is plainly discernable — If I had not been married & happy — far more happy than I ever expected to be — He would not have married —
I have erraced a name which I do not wish published — If I have failed to do it any where strike it out when you come to it — That is the word Sarah
I thank you for your last lecture
Lincoln wrote a letter (a long one which he read to me) to Dr Drake
It would be worth much to you if you could procure the original —
Chs D. Drake of St Louis may have his Fathers papers — The date which I give you — will aid in the search —
I remember Dr Drakes reply — which was that he would not undertake to priscribe for him without a personal interview —
I would advise you to make some effort to get the letter
Your friend &c
J. F. Speed
Library of Congress: Herndon-Weik Collection. Manuscript Division. Library of Congress. Washington, D.C. 2826 — 27